I’ve been thinking about Fear a lot lately.
Actually I’ve been thinking about fear a lot for about 4 years now. More on why at a later date.
Last week I took some time to sit outside and really dig into my thoughts.
Within an hour I had written three full pages of notes about fear. Fear Vs. love…dealing with your fears without being a crazy person…Franklin Roosevelt…
The usual stuff.
When I was done, I had re-realized something I came to believe a long time ago. That fear, in it’s many forms and disguises, is always the thing that holds us back from doing what we want or what we ’should’ be doing. That if we ever really want to accomplish our goals, we’ve got to deal with our own fear first.
So here’s what I want to do this week:
I had a teacher a few years ago who taught me a great analogy. She compared fear to a dark, unfamiliar room. When we’re in that room, we don’t have the confidence to move freely because we don’t know where we’ll stub our toes or knock our heads.
One way to turn the light on is to speak your fear. Admitting what scares you is like shining a flashlight on it. And usually what you see is a scared little puppy, barking it’s heart out to scare you away from something he thinks will hurt you.
So today I want to tell you something that I’ve been keeping from you. Ready? Here goes:
I have a second job at a local chain restaurant. Yep. In addition to writing and designing and marketing, I sling pizza. I wear a goofy, hideous tie with a square bottom, and a uniform whose pieces look awful together.
Why have I been afraid to admit such a small thing? I had my reasons. I felt it clashed with a ‘professional’ image. I didn’t want you to think I was a fake. I didn’t want to admit that for a portion of each week, I do a completely unrelated, uncreative job just to get some health insurance (which is why I work there, by the way. Not to get political, but it’s the only way for me to afford health care).
And hopefully you don’t think those things about me. But if you do, that’s ok.
Havi Brooks makes a great case on her site that success in small business is about finding your right people. And I realize now that having that silly little secret out in public won’t hurt me, it will help me. The people who read this and decide not to work with me? They’re absolutely in the right. They can tell that we’re not a good match for each other. It saves us both time and frustration.
But the people who read this and are further encouraged that I can help them – you’re much more likely to get along with me. You’re more likely to be my right people.
And if that’s you, cool! Welcome to the new, smaller, closer circle of br.com readers. I’m extra happy to know you.
And huge, gigantic, incredible thanks to Havi Brooks. I’ve just started reading her stuff, and she’s already inspiring change in me. You can check her out at www.thefluentself.com.
Tags: fear, Havi Brooks, right people